Although I hate the thought that I'm wishing my life away.
After yesterday's sad sack show and the subsequent firm but gentle pep talk by Lesley who is wise beyond her years and bursting to the seams with good advice, by the way, I've decided this will be a Positive Post.
Hence, a list I made a couple of days ago to remind me why I want to lose weight and what I'd like to do when I get there, or even on the way to being there.
So, as they say in self help groups (on the TV at least): Let's Share.
1. Horseriding
I've always wanted to do a horse riding or pony trekking holiday but, in sympathy to the animal world, I've so far not imposed myself onto some innocent, doe eyed beast. But I'd really like to do this when I'm slim.
2. Salsa dancing
I'd like to incorporate lots of exercise into my every day life and I'd really like to be able to learn to salsa fairly competently. I can probably do this on my way to being slim, but I've no desire to sweat all over people at the moment. I think I'd rather start working out on my own and work up the stamina to do a proper class.
3. Non frumpy clothes
There are some funky clothes for chunky people, but they are usually more expensive than I can afford and I end up buying things that I like but don't Love and 'making do'. I used to have some sort of style, involving vaguely hippyish styles but nothing really sits as well on my frame now, and some things I just can't get away with. I'd love to reconnect with the old me in that respect.
4. Running
Now, I've never liked running and haven't had much success to date. I managed to jog/walk around the Race for Life course last year but that's about it. However, I'd like to build up to running a 10km race at some point. That seems unimaginable at this point in time, but if there's a will there's a way and we can do anything we put our minds to. (did you notice how I chickened out of actually owning that cliche?! I could have said 'I can do anything I put my mind to' but I deliberately woosed out and went for the all encompassing 'we'. Hmmmm...interesting.)
5. Boob job
I've wanted a boob job for about 5 years now in a vague manner. I've always known it's pointless doing it when I'm a chunky monkey so when I get slim I've definitely going to do it! Dolly Parton here we come! (haha...!)
6. Skiing holiday
With Sim. As long as she doesn't get too competitive.... x
7. Slimming club leader
I've been on diets since before time began. I've tried most things (although never the infamous Cabbage Soup Diet which sounds even more extreme than LL!) and failed and know how people feel and how desperate they can feel about themselves and I'd love to work with others and help them through it too. Feel a bit self conscious writing that so close to the beginning of the diet but it's something I'd like to do one day, so that's ok.
8. Conceive.
What with being so overweight and having PCOS (Poly Cystic Ovary Syndrome) my chances of conceiving aren't great so the weight loss should go a long way to relieving some of the symptoms of PCOS and give the wee fishies a clear run to the egg! (was that a bit graphic? sorry!) I'd love to have some kiddies but I also want to be fit enough to care for them and play with them to the level they deserve.
That will do for now, I think. They are all very positive things to look forward to if I succeed in this. I mean when I succeed at this. Of course. Roll on my future without the rolls of lard!
Lesley - I'm going to have a serious think about trying to join LL again. The leader puts me off though, but maybe I'm judging her too harshly. I wish there was another group in Wales. I think the support would be invaluable and not having the option of real meals alongside the counselling was always the lure in the first place. I'll let you know how I get on. Thanks again for your wise words - they mean lots to me. x
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